The sociologists might be crying and cringing at conferences and seminars about the plight of Indian women, but nothing concrete has been achieved in this direction. The problem lies in the patriarchal society that we live in, where boys are given unfair advantage over girls.
Not very long ago, a man was considered to be the bread earner for the family and woman was supposed to look after the children and household chores. Things have changed since then. Today, working woman is a norm and in many families women are earning more than their male counterparts – thanks to the modern economy.
But, Indian society is still unfair towards women. They put all the restrictions and onus of “Sanskars” on the lady that takes over as “Bahu” in her husband’s home. She is often the target of all verbal onslaught that sometimes turns into physical aggression as well.
Regardless, of whether she is working or not, she is supposed to do “Sewa” of her in-laws and husband. Even if she does something with a good intention, it’s often taken wrongly and labeled with Hindi words such as
“ Tez, Chalak and Hoshiyar ”
At some places, she needs to take permission of her mother-in-law in virtually everything – even while ordering or doing something for her husband.
Nobody cares if you are hardworking, decent, beautiful, educated, and honest; a woman is a woman after all and she is considered to be a subordinate.
Social issues and discrimination is commonplace in India. In many households, the daughter-in-law isn’t treated like a human being, despite her commitment, love, respect, affection, and sacrifices for her husband and in-laws.
The Painful Account of a Working Professional
Continuous mistreatment and bad behavior completely shatters a sensitive and educated girl. Geeta(Name Change), 29, a working woman in Gurgaon narrates her ordeal. She works as an IT manager in a private company. She got married a year ago to a person, who was not working at the time. Sensing the situation, she often offered financial assistance even when her husband was out buying grocery. To this, her husband often came home shouting and hurling verbal abuses –
“ Ye Paise ka Robe Apne Maa-Baap ko Dikhana ”
was his way to defend his ego.
Geeta shared an excellent camaraderie with her wannabe husband before marriage; they exchanged gifts and he treated her like a girl-friend. But everything changed after marriage. Her text messages were termed by her husband as “Rubbish”. Even her best efforts to perform “Sewa” of her mother-in-law in the form of giving her massages were snubbed by the old lady.
She didn’t even get the desired respect as a daughter-in-law. Her husband didn’t pay attention to her and it led her into severe depression. The conversations between Geeta and her husband got sore and he repeatedly used to say that
“ He Didn’t Like Her ”
He even went to the extent of saying that Geeta’s parents cheated on him.
“ Unhone Mere Saath kaand kiya Hai ”
Now can you imagine a person using such language for his sisters, when they get married?
Before marriage husband’s friends or relative asked her –
“He is Extremely Shy in Nature”,
But After Marriage They Say –
“He is very Aggressive, Egoistic and Jatt Buddhi”.
While dealing with such situations, everyone advises the women –
“Aurat ko Bahut kuch Sehna Padta Hai”,
but nobody says that men also need to be raised to be responsible and well mannered.
“ Sanskars are not meant only for the female gender. No one should be given an unfair advantage because of their gender”.
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1. Sanskaari Bahus…are NOT rehabilitation Centres for badly raised men..
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